How the Devil screwed up God’s plans

A long, long time ago the Devil was in his cavernous laboratory studying a detailed picture of the human brain that his advanced technological equipment was projecting on a big viewing screen.

One of his henchmen walked into the room and asked the Devil what he was doing.

“I am looking for flaws in human brain design so that I can further disrupt God’s intended purpose,” said the Devil, scouring over every neuron and connection in the brain’s structure.

“Didn’t you already spoil the human heart?” questioned the henchman.

“I am still not satisfied.” The Devil then increased magnification, revealing deeper levels of structure in the neuron itself that still remain undiscovered by human neuroscientists. “Look here, deep inside this neuron. This interior substrate is where God secretly places sacred data in children to serve as a matrix for future spiritual growth.”

“I know, that matrix is what some call the ‘remains,’” said the hellish sidekick.

“Yes, and I think I have discovered a way to thwart this matrix from ever developing during a person’s short, physical life on earth,” replied the Devil with a nasty grin. “You see, God’s influence flows out of heaven and some of it gets focused on the remains, deep within the neuron. The rest of it, in its downward flow, is perverted and twisted by our devilish activity or it simply leaks away where it is harmlessly dissipated outwards without bringing any detriment to our wonderfully wicked projects.”

The Devil meditates for a moment, then continues his talk. “I have calculated that I can create a lower form of consciousness in children after they reach the age of about five, when they begin to lose their innocence. At that age children can learn from their parents and adults how to lie and deceive others. Over time, children will also learn to deceive themselves.”

“What is this lower form of consciousness?” asked the Devil’s loyal admirer.

“This is the corporeal mind,” answered the Devil. “It develops from habit but the beauty of it is that it is a fabricated personality and functions mechanically. This sets up a double whammy for God. First of all, this renders God’s heavenly influence into mere mechanical energy, and secondly, any valuable information coming from the outside world—like hearing sermons or reading the Holy Word—gets trapped in people’s corporeal memory banks like undigested food in the stomach.”

“I am beginning to see the genius of your plan,” said the henchman. “Any data that gets stuck in a person’s memory banks cannot be used to feed the remains.”

“Correct!” exclaimed the Devil. “And the information is guaranteed to get stuck there because people will believe that their fabricated corporeal personality is their true consciousness.”

“But what if some theologian, like Emanuel Swedenborg, convinces the people of earth to escape this condition of illusion?” asked the slightly nervous henchmen.

“People will not believe it if you tell them they are frauds. You can’t convince people that they need something they already think they have—like true consciousness. So even if they go to church every Sunday and manifest neighborly love and usefulness toward each other it will all be done from their false consciousness! Simply put, people want to become good straightaway, without dealing with their inner obstacles and the true issues facing spiritual transformation.”

“Imagine that. You have come up with a way to make even goodness one of your tools for damnation. Brilliant!” exclaimed the excited disciple of hell.

The Devil and his henchmen laughed so hard they couldn’t help having an organic accident.


About thegodguy

EDWARD F. SYLVIA, M.T.S. Philosopher/Theologian Edward F. Sylvia attended the School of Visual Arts in New York and received his Master of Theological Studies at the Pacific School of Religion in Berkeley, CA and a Certificate of Swedenborgian Studies from the Swedenborgian House of Studies. He is a member of the Center for Theology and the Natural Sciences (C.T.N.S.) and the Swedenborg Scientific Association (S.S.A.). Award-winning author of "Sermon From the Compost Pile: Seven Steps Toward Creating An Inner Garden" and "Proving God," which fulfills a continuing vision that God’s fingerprints of love can be found everywhere in the manifest universe. His most recent book, "Swedenborg & Gurdjieff: The Missing Links" is an edgy collection of anti-intuitive essays for personal transformation that challenges and inspires. He has been a student of the ideas of both Emanuel Swedenborg and George I. Gurdjieff for over thirty years. Read more about TheGodGuy, his books and his ideas at
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11 Responses to How the Devil screwed up God’s plans

  1. snarfy says:

    Wow, great mythology – rivals the Greeks and Romans. A bit derivative of Milton, tho.

    • thegodguy says:

      Thanks snarfy!

      However, I don’t think Milton could have made the Devil such an expert on neuroscience! 😉

      Spiritually yours,

  2. The devil is a tricky dude; but even his temptations of Jesus Christ were a flop. He knows he’s a loser in the end.

    • thegodguy says:

      Dear Constance,

      It is true that the Devil will lose in the end. But a lot of human souls will be lost as well if people do not take some responsibility in cooperating with the Lord God. Most people are oblivious to the obstacles that stand in the way of salvation – “us”!

      Spiritually yours,

  3. Roger Noah says:

    You do know that the Devil is a metaphor for the hells and not a real being. But that’s besides the main point – which I completely agree with except …

    you use the term “damnation” too freely in your posts. I know that any damnation is self-generated and not a sentence from the Lord. If you were only trying to scare people into spiritual development, I would heartily support your endeavor. However, methinks you believe that most folks are headed for self-damnation and that only a few will make it. Matthew 7:13-14 notwithstanding, I believe the converse. Yes, it is theoretically possible for us to screw up so much that we will end up damning ourselves. But this is, in my view, just a theoretical possibility. Why we’ll not end up in hell is God’s relentless effort to save us, part of which is to threaten us with the hell that we’ll end up escaping from! Yes, we can choose hell. But given God’s persistence, will we end up choosing it? Not likely, but I will keep this “factoid” a secret except in learned forums like this one. To the unsophisticated masses I say, “Repent, else you will end up in hell by your own choice”. That is the “lower truth” – the “higher truth” should be shared with only those who are ready for it and who will not abuse it to delay repentance and regeneration.


    • thegodguy says:

      Dear Roger,

      I hope my modern mythology didn’t convey the idea that the hells are sparsely populated (I only mentioned two individuals). However, your worldview that damnation is just a theoretical possibility means that the evil strategy mentioned in my article is quite effective. The “Devil” is counting on the fact that many people will believe that everything is “fine and dandy.” Where in all of Swedenborg’s writings does it say that damnation is a rare thing? Heck, if we can count on the Lord God’s relentless attempt to save us Swedenborg could have written his essential message on a piece of scrap paper!

      Spiritually yours,

    • Domenic says:

      Sometimes the enemy infuses into the soul a great sensible sweetness and moves her to tears, after going through a most severe and immoderate fast. He does this to encourage the person to continue indiscreet austerities, that thus the head may give way, and the brain be injured, and that afterwards melancholy or anger may ensue, and the body may be broken down. Or he wishes the person to give way to singular habits and to set him up by pride.

      Sometimes the devil gives these tears and sensible sweetnesses after a very plentiful meal of meat and drink. And this he does to bring fasting and abstinence into disrepute, and to encourage a person to gluttonous living, as a means of procuring devotion.

  4. Domenic says:

    The enemy has a trick also of hiding his working under the guise of devotion towards holy and religious persons, and a spiritual friendship; so that two persons, frequently talking, eating, and laughing together, may lose their guard, and take little liberties in joke, and that thus the holy and spiritual love may degenerate into an abominable carnal affection, and at last lead to a most shameful end.

    • thegodguy says:

      Dear Domenic,

      Why do you use such archaic language to make your points? Sounds too “preachy.”

      Spiritually yours,
      TheGodGuy (with the emphasis on “Guy”)

      • Domenic says:

        you also have an anusual way of expressing your views, and explaining yourself with certain type of words you use, im just useing what ever i have that pertains to the subject matter,

  5. thegodguy says:

    Dear Domenic,

    It sounds like you are channeling some philosopher from a bygone era. However, if those are the words you are pulling out of a hat then so be it!

    Have you had any luck finding what Swedenborg said concerning animals?

    Spiritually yours,

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